The Top X Reasons to Move to OSX Today!

X. Fewer choices.

Aren't you tired of all those choices about how the user interface should look? Isn't it annoying when you try to use someone else's Mac and they arrange their files and applications in a different way than you do? Desktops littered with aliases and dozens of windows littering your workspace. Eeeeeewww. Well get ready for X, with new Lockstep™ technology!! With OSX, we've reduced the number of "confusing" user interface options. Looking for something? Anything? It's in the dock. Or in a folder called pub/misc/etc/bin/~usr/root/prefs/my_docs/ Use the new Finder's Column View to drill right down to it. Now isn't that just a better way? Yes, it is.


IX. The Terminal

With a truly modern OS (based on the software found in 1960s mainframes), who needs a limited menu system cluttering up your screen? Now Grandma can "get under the hood" and interact directly with her machine instead of having to deal with some bothersome "middle man." Who needs Disk First Aid or Norton Utilities? Just enter the terminal mode and type fsck and you're on your way to liberation.


VIII. The power to work YOUR way

Have you ever been under a deadline? Your boss says he needs that printout NOW! Isn't that stressful? Well guess what Mr. Boss-Man? My Epson printer doesn't work in Classic and my App isn't Carbonized. So cool your jets! You'll get your printout in 20 minutes, after I reboot in 9.1! And NO, cut-and-paste DOESN'T work between Carbonized and Classic Apps, so just leave me alone, OK?


VII. No more system wide freezes and crashes

Remember how annoying it was when your machine got a BOMB or a FREEZE in a program and you lost your work and had to reboot? Well say hello to protected memory! Now you may get an occasional kernel panic or Classic may get corrupted and become unusable or you may need to reinstall the entire OSX operating system from time to time because, honestly, when this baby goes down we're not even sure that it can be fixed, but isn't that better than Apple-Control-Reset?


VI. Aqua

Like blue things that throb? Well, you're in for a treat! We've got big honkin' throbbing things all over the place. And (because we listen) we're planning on adding a way to turn off throbbing in a future release for our special needs customers with epilepsy. And if you don't like blue, well there's an alternate gray interface that makes all windows look like they're in the background. We call it our "colorblind option" and we wanted you to see how this misunderstood minority sees common everyday objects like traffic lights. Hmmm. Is the red button on the left or the right? You decide. And if you don't like aqua, we've got plans for a lot of black and brushed metal so stay tuned.


V. The Dock

Ever been on a sea-cruise in a gale? Well if you look back fondly on that experience, you're gonna love the dock. Things whoosh in and out and get bigger and smaller and wave back and forth from left to right and bounce up and down just the way our team of NeXT user-interface experts told us they should. And lucky for you, nobody's gonna move that trash bucket 'cause we nailed it to the dock, right where you need it.


IV. Easy migration

Got hundreds or maybe thousands of old "Classic" applications? Not to worry, they'll crash just as often in OSX as they used to in OS9, except slower (unless they talk directly to hardware such as digital cameras, scanners, printers, etc). And soon you'll be able to buy brand new versions of all your software that will allow you to use your peripherals again. (Contact the software manufacturer to determine the release date of an OSX compatible version of their software. Contact them repeatedly. Ask them "pretty please make an OSX version!" and tell them you're saving your pennies.)


III. Killer graphics

Have you ever moved your mouse really fast over the OS9 menus? My God, I can't read that fast! Our thoughts exactly. So in OSX, the menus and windows open and close much more slowly, and only after a noticeable time lag, giving you precious moments to think "Is this really where I want to go? Is this truly the file I seek?" (It's very Zen. Especially on our new fanless silent models. Stare into the crystal cube!) And check out our new translucent menus. Have you ever wanted to read a document that's underneath a menu item? Well now you can! You just have to train your eye to distinguish between what's on top and what's underneath. It's kind of like holding several pages of text up to the light and trying to read the middle one. Another Apple first!


II. Memory is cheap

This is a great time to buy memory, and boy can OSX use it. Remember back when a Mac Plus had 4 Megabyes of RAM and it seemed like infinity? Well this isn't your father's Macintosh. With pre-emptive multi-tasking, you can now run all three native apps at the same time (TextEdit and Fetch beta and the Process Viewer and dozens more coming by summer, or fall for the "laggard" software companies) and you can watch the process viewer show you that Stickies is using 87% of the CPU while you type!


I. Longhorn isn't out yet

Windows 1 and 2 sucked. Windows 3 was lame but usable. 95 was a big improvement. 98 not so much. NT increased stability. 2000 was stable and ran more apps. XP has the duck AND the poppy! But Longhorn's not out yet, so get OSX and start converting your files to the new naming convention: All filenames should have three dots in the middle of the name, and should end in a three letter extension such as .rtf or .pdf or .wtf so you can tell what kind of file they (probably) are. No more double-clicking a file you created in Graphic Converter and having it open in Graphic Converter when you wanted PhotoShop! Duh! Now everything will open in TextEdit and become a .pdf when you save! So much more convenient.


Did we miss something? We'd love to hear from you. We make our products better with feedback from loyal Mac users just like you.


0. Oh, and there's One More Thing

The Macintosh is the only computer in the world that ships with a mouse that has the right number of buttons. Back in the dark days of DOS, the PC people used to call Mac people sissy for using a mouse. Now they have mice with more buttons than an Oxford shirt. Maybe that makes them super-sissies? No, they just don't get it. Steve explains it like this: One plus nothing (a zero) makes 10, and people, who have 10 fingers and 10 toes, think in base 10. PCs ship with two button mice. Two is binary, and people (except for that weird guy in your college math class) don't think in binary. So using a PC is like working with only two thumbs. See? It's so simple.