In case you need further proof that the human race is doomed because of stupidity and/or litigiousness, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods.
On a Sears hairdryer: "Do not use while sleeping." (But that's the only time I have to work on my hair!)
On a bag of Fritos: "You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside." (The shoplifter special?)
On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap." (And that would be how???....)
On some Swanson frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost." (But it's just a suggestion.)
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down." (Well...duh, a bit late, huh!)
On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating." (And you thought???...)
On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body." (But that would save so much time!)
On Boot's Children's Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication." (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)
On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness." (And I'm taking this because???....)
On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only." (As opposed to what?)
On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use." (Now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.)
On Sunsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts." (Talk about a news flash!)
On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts." (Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?)
On a child's superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly."
On a Swedish chainsaw: "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals." (...was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)
and finally, one of my personal favorites...
On those little moisture absorbing silica gel packs that come with your new DVD player or pair of shoes: "Do Not Eat!" (Why would people think they were in there for them to eat???!!!)