Communication

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Communication

When people meet in groups, it is inevitable that power and control issues will emerge. After all, it is only human to be happy when things are going our way. When a student refuses to cooperate or engages in defensive behaviors, we tend to react, to become defensive as well. We tend to meet force with force, to exchange verbal or emotional blows. We actually have more power if we choose a strategy that sidesteps defensiveness.

The following power strategies are ways of communicating outside of the power struggle, getting what we want by redefining interactions and setting up more positive responses. Spend at least an hour observing a classroom and record instances of these communication strategies. To heighten awareness, try sitting in the teacher's lounge, in an adult classroom or monitoring the interactions at a family get-together.

Strategy	Definition	Communication
Assertion	Forcefully asserting one's way	I voice my wishes loudly
Bargaining	Explicit statement about two-way exchange	You do this for me, I'll do this for you
Compromise	Both people give up what they see as desired outcome for a mutually valued goal	There is a disagreement so each gives ground
Emotional display	Facial expressions and body language that express needs or feelings	Sweet face, pout, smile
Expertise	Explain insights or knowledge	"I think this will work since"
Fait accompli	Openly doing what one wishes, usually in contrast to what is best for the group	Come at 10:00 even though group meets at 9:30
Hinting	Indirect attempts to get things as wish	Drop hints, set up a confederate to broach idea
Manipulate thoughts	Get others to "believe" it's their idea	Move others to believe its their idea
Orchestrate others' emotions	Project feelings, shift the mood	Come in angry, tell jokes
Persistence	Continuing to assert needs to change others	I reiterate my point
Persuasion	Persuasive coaxing and pleading	I get my way by wheedling
Reason	Rational argument or logical points to change others' minds or influence the decision	Debate and argue logically
Statement	Simple statement of what is desired	I simply state my needs

Power and control are part of social interactions and relationships. Meeting personal needs and simultaneously building community with several others, who also have needs and desires, is a delicate dance. Students alternate between self interest and seeking acceptance by others in the classroom.

Rather than "creating a monster," teachers can use communication strategies, self discipline and self soothing to move outside the power struggle, defining higher expectations and modeling mature ways to resolve conflict.

Once you have completed this topic you should:

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E-mail J'Anne Ellsworth at Janne.Ellsworth@nau.edu

Course Created by J'Anne Ellsworth & Center for Technology Enhanced Learning