Rage and Control
To complete
this assignment successfully, you should:
- Take the
self assessment on hostility and reflect on the findings.
- Study
the chart for handling anger.
- Fill in
your Name and Email address
- Send Email
to confirm completion
- Tally
up 's
for completion of this assignment.
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Click
on these objects. Each leads to areas on the web for personal reflection
and returning to inner peace.
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Although
we have amassed an enormous body of knowledge and a mastery of the external
world, we have neglected exploring the internal world.
-Robert Ornstein
Fight
/ Flight Hostility Questionnaire
Directions:
Fill this out as honestly as possible. You need not share the score with
others.
- A person
drives by my yard with the car stereo blaring acid rock. A. I wonder
if the driver is ruining his hearing. B. I can feel my blood pressure
starting to rise.
- The person
who cuts my hair trims off more than I wanted. A.. I tell him or her
what a lousy job he or she did. B . I figure it'll grow back, and I
resolve to give my instructions more forcefully next time.
- I am
in the express checkout line at the supermarket, where a sign reads:
"No more than 10 items, please!" A. I pick up a magazine to
pass the time. B. I glance ahead to see if anyone has more than ten
items.
- Many large
cities have a visible number of homeless people. A. I believe that the
homeless are down and out because they lack ambition. B. The homeless
are victims of illness or some other misfortune.
- There
have been times when I was very angry with someone. A. I was always
able to stop short of hitting them. B. I have, on occasion, hit or shoved
them.
- The newspaper
contains a prominent news story about drug related crime. A. I wish
the government had better educational/drug programs, even for pushers.
B. I wish we could put every drug pusher away for good.
- The prevalence
of AIDS has reached alarming proportions. A. This is largely the result
of irresponsible behavior on the part of a small group of the population.
B. AIDS is a major tragedy.
- I sometimes
argue with a friend or relative A. I find profanity an effective tool.
B. I hardly ever use profanity.
- I am
stuck in a traffic jam. A. I usually am not particularly upset. B. I
quickly start to feel irritated and annoyed.
- There
is a really important job to be done. A. I prefer to do it myself. B.
I am apt to call on my friends or coworkers to help.
- Sometimes
I keep my angry feelings to myself. A. Doing so can often prevent me
from making a mountain out of a molehill. B. Doing so is usually a bad
idea.
- Another
driver butts ahead of me in traffic. A. I usually flash my lights or
honk my horn. B. I stay farther back behind such a driver.
- Someone
treats me unfairly. A. I usually forget it rather easily. B. I am apt
to keep thinking about it for hours.
- The cars
ahead of me on an unfamiliar road start to slow and stop as they approach
a curve. A. I assume that there is a construction site ahead. B. I assume
someone ahead had a fender bender.
- Someone
expresses an ignorant belief. A. I try to correct him or her. B. I am
likely to let it pass.
- I am caught
in a slow moving bank or supermarket line. A. I usually start to fume
at people who dawdle ahead of me. B. I seldom notice the wait.
- Someone
is being rude or annoying. A. I am apt to avoid him or her in the future.
B. I might have to straight them out.
- An election
year roles around. A. I learn anew that politicians are not to be trusted.
B. I am caught up in the excitement of pulling for my candidate.
- An elevator
stops too long on a floor above where I am waiting. A. I soon start
to feel irritated and annoyed. B. I start planning the rest of my day.
- I am around
someone I don't like. A. I try to end the encounter as soon as p[possible.
B. I find it hard not to be rude to him or her.
- I see
a very overweight person working down the street. A. I wonder why this
person has such little self-control. B. I think that he or she might
have a hard time walking.
- I am
riding as a passenger in the front seat of a car. A. I take the opportunity
to enjoy the scenery. B. I try to stay alert for obstacles ahead.
- Someone
criticizes something I have done. A. I feel annoyed. B. I try to decide
whether the criticism is justified.
- I am involved
in an argument. A. I concentrate hard so that I can get my point across.
B. I can feel my heart pounding and I breathe harder.
- A friend
or coworker disagrees with me. A. I try to explain my position clearly.
B. I am apt to get into an argument with him or her.
- Someone
is speaking very slowly during a conversation. A. I am apt to finish
his or her sentences. B. I am apt to listen until s/he finishes.
- If they
were put on the horn system, most wouldn't sneak into a movie theater
without paying. A. That's because they are afraid of being caught. B.
It's because it would be wrong.
- I have
strong beliefs about rearing children. A. I try to reward mine when
they behave well. B. I make sure they know what the rules are.
- I hear
news of another terrorist attack. A. I feel like lashing out. B. I wonder
how people can be so cruel.
- I am
talking with my dearest friend. A. I often find my thoughts racing ahead
to what I plan to say next. B. I find it easy to pay close attention
to what he or she is saying.
- There
have been times in the past when I was really angry. A. I have never
thrown things or slammed a door. B. At times I have thrown something
or slammed a door.
- Life is
full of little annoyances. A. They often seem to get under my skin.
B. They seem to roll off my back unnoticed.
- I disapprove
of something a friend has done. A. I usually keep such disapproval to
myself. B. I usually let him or her know about it.
- I am
requesting a seat assignment for an airline flight. A. I usually request
a seat in a specific area of the plane. B. I generally leave the choice
to the agent.
- I feel
a certain way nearly every day of the week. A. I feel grouchy some of
the time. B. I usually stay on an even keel.
- Someone
bumps into me at the store. A. I pass it off as an accident. B. I feel
irritated at the person's clumsiness.
- Someone
around me is preparing a meal. A. I keep an eye out to make sure nothing
burns or cooks too long. B. I either talk with them or find something
else to do.
- A friend
calls at the last minute to say that s/he is too tired to go out tonight
and I am stuck with expensive tickets. A. I try to find someone else
to go with me. B. I tell my friend just how inconsiderate s/he is.
- I recall
something that angered me previously. A. I feel angry all over again.
B. The memory doesn't bother me nearly as much as the actually event
did.
- I see
people walking around in shopping malls. A. Many of them are either
shopping or exercising. B. Many are wasting time.
- Someone
is hogging the conversation at a party. A. I look for an opportunity
to put him or her down. B. I move to another group.
- At times
I have to work with incompetent people. A. I concentrate on my part
of the job. B. Having to put up with them ticks me off.
- My spouse,
boyfriend or girlfriend is going to get me a birthday present. A. I
prefer to pick it out myself. B. I prefer to be surprised.
- I hold
a poor opinion of someone. A. I keep it to myself. B. I let others know
about it.
- In most
arguments I have, the roles are consistent. A. I am the angrier one.
B. The other person is angrier than I am.
- Slow-moving
lines can often be found in banks and supermarkets. A. They are an unavoidable
part of modern life. B. They are often due to someone's incompetence.
Cynicism: a mistrusting attitude regarding
the motives of people in general, leading one to be constantly on
guard against the "misbehavior" of others. |
3 (B) 4 (A) 7 (A) 10 (A) 14 (B) 18
(B) 21 (A) 22 (B) 27 (A) 30 (A) 34 (A) 37 (A) 40 (B) 43 (A) 46 (B)
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Anger: the emotion so often engendered
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1 (B) 6 (B) 9 (B) 13 (B) 16 (A) 19
(A) 23 (A) 23 (B) 29 (A) 32 (A) 35 (A) 36 (B) 39 (A) 42 (B) 45 (A)
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Aggression: The behavior to which many
hostile people are driven by unpleasant negative emotions of anger,
irritation, frustration, rage. |
2 (A) 5 (B) 8 (A) 11 (B) 12 (A) 15
(A) 17 (B) 20 (B) 25 (B) 26 (A) 28 (B) 31 (B) 33 (B) 38 (B) 41 (A)
44 (B) |
Key:
0 - 3 = low 4 - 6 = borderline 7 - + = consider making a personal
change
Hostility
_____________ Anger _____________ Aggression _____________
Total _____________
* * If
the total score is more than 10, it would also be healthful to consider
ways to increase your self awareness, sense of well-being and outlets
for success.
You may need to spend more time with people who like to be nice to you
and appreciate who you are as well as what you are doing. Remember to
be one of those people.
The following
is a flow chart to help you think about dealing constructively with
anger and lowering your stress level when you have too much going at
once or become frustrated with life events.
Sometimes,
when we are far from home, when the school environment stretches
ahead and behind for eons, we can become lonely, feel out of place
and like others are controlling our lives and in large part, our
destiny. We can get so busy juggling the needs and demands of
others, that we lose track of a sense of self, joy, peace. If
you feel like that, you can always turn around and do something
kind and supportive for someone very important and special --
you could be good to yourself. |
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Many
students finish course work and come back to talk about what
it is like to teach. Most of them said that they thought college
was a busy time, but were shocked to find out how much busier
they were once they were teaching.
Why
is this important? We often promise ourselves a change, a break,
a less busy time when today is done -- but it is today when
we need to take care -- to find fulfillment, to be at peace.
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Send
a confirmation of completion in text field below (e.g. I completed
the Rage & Control survey), please no personal answers:
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